Rorate Caeli

Guidance for young parents: how to raise a big, holy Catholic family (ongoing series)

After posting a video of a Catholic family with 15 children -- that boasted eight religious vocations -- we asked our readers (see here) to write into us and share their stories on what it's like to raise a big family, and what they did or are still doing to make their family holy, happy and peaceful. Here is one of those stories.

Please consider sending your story to Rorate (see here for very flexible instructions) to post in this on-going series to help inspire young Catholic couples to forgo the abuses of Natural Family Planning (NFP) and simply go fourth and multiply with faith and confidence in a loving and all-knowing God.

To view all of these stories, click the "The joy of big families" tag at the end of this post. For those who have sent in stories, we will post soon:

Written by New York Mom:


My husband and I have 8 children ... 4 boys - 4 girls. We were married with the TLM almost 20 years ago. 

My husband just graduated from law school and I was in my third year of law school when I was expecting our first child, nine months after we were married. I have never used my degree outside of home but I sure use it inside the home! We have done it all as far as schooling. We have home schooled and some have gone to traditional school... very orthodox but away from home.  We have tried to find the best fit for each child and have made mistakes but I believe our kids know that we are trying to do the best we can for them.  If I had to say a few things that have worked for us in keeping our eyes on the prize .... Heaven .... I would humbly suggest the following:


1. No TV - maybe an old movie as a treat here and there but nothing on TV.

2. No access to the Internet ... I have a computer but I am the only one who has the password and I have to be there. It hasn't hurt them to read books and go to the library.

3. No modern music...classical only

4. Good literature ,,, no junk,,, read classics at the right age and lots of them and they will be lifelong readers, have an excellent vocabulary and ace the reading section of the SAT.  If they read junk they will never want to put in the work it takes to read difficult literature later.

5. Tell them that your family is different from the start and when things come up that you have to say no to ... They won't be surprised or unhappy.

6. Ask for observations from a parent or someone you trust who knows you and your family well. My mother has given us invaluable advice on what she sees going well in our family and things that aren't working. Sometimes others can see things we can't and it has been a blessing for us.

7. Always make dinner a fun time for talking and laughing and I think it is important to show your love for your family by making really good dinners. They always seem to respond to the effort.

8. Be there!  Be there for your children in mind, body and spirit and do not let all the distractions of the world into your home.