October 23rd
2025
Dear Aldo Maria,
It seems
that after reading the text of the Summary Document of the Synodal Path of the
Churches in Italy, the ineffable World Health Organization has discovered the
existence of a new terrifying epidemic triggered by the terrifying disease called
syndroma inclusivitatis viralis, also generally known as Charles V
syndrome or todos (todos todos) caballeros syndrome.
It's an insidious syndrome, but luckily, a swab
isn't needed to identify it. It primarily affects ecclesial ambientes and
manifests itself not by a fever, a cough, or a sore throat, but by a sudden
aversion to words like "sin," "truth,"
"tradition," and “non-negotiable principles." Patients with inclusivitis
tend to replace these words with more welcoming terms: fragility, journey,
diversity, dialogue, listening, pastoral care, and the Spirit of the Age.
The diagnosis is quite simple: the victim shows
a obsessive need “not to judge” and in the most severe cases repeats the word
“inclusion” like a mantra, using it as a intercalation or a filler word every
time they want to express a concept - and even more so if they have no
concept to express.

Regular reading of the Gospel
and St. Pauls’s letters is a sure cure for “inclusivitus”
The decisive test to determine whether the
patient is affected by this terrible affliction is to remind them that the
Gospel also speaks of sin and conversion and that Jesus is the only source
of salvation: they react immediately with displeasure. At best they change the subject, at worst they
accuse you of rigidity and backwardness.
It is still not quite clear how this virus
spreads: the most respected specialists in this field, however, are banking on “liturgical
and synodal transmission” (mainly the latter!) given that the ailment is predominantly
present and aggressive in Seminaries, Pastoral Assemblies, and Diocesan and Synodal
Commissions.
Inclusivitus appears to surface from prolonged contact with the language of NGOs and UN
agencies. Most, however, believe these are uncontrolled mutations of the Post-Conciliar
Virus that have triggered an irreversible rift with the past. The most likely
cause remains the very old one: the temptation to please the world more than
God.
At present, no vaccine exists for this
affliction, but the therapies that appear most effective include the reading of
the Gospel and the letters of St. Paul (even the incommodious parts), repeated
cycles of Thomistic logic, and above all, absolute abstinence from synodal
assemblies.

Reading in cycles this
work by St. Thomas Aquinas is also recommended to cure this grave condition
If left
untreated, inclusivitis leads to serious complications: the patient
confuses the Church with an NGO, sin with fragility, and mercy with indulgence.
In many priests, it also causes a loss of a sense of the ridiculous and strange
phenomena occur, such as; rainbow Nativity scenes, eco-friendly
Masses, and Syncretistic ceremonies.
There is however still hope: many who were cured
of this ailment said that the disease went into remission and even disappeared
altogether after reading the sentence: “But let your
speech be yea, yea: no, no.” Others said that instant healing occurred
after discovering that the Truth cannot be updated by majority vote. It [the Truth]
remains the Truth despite the approval of the Synodal Committee.
Most of all there is no [real] inclusion without the
truth.
Cordially yours,
Vincenzo Rizza